My Heart My Mother

 My heart, my mother. My heart, my mother. My heart of my becoming.

~ Normandi Ellis, Awakening Osiris: The Egyptian Book of the Dead

I once asked my mother to check if my heart was still beating. I was about six and it was late at night. I got up from bed feeling anxious about my heart. My mother touched my chest and assured me my heart was still beating.

When in the womb our hearts are started by the electrical energy of our mother’s hearts. Once born it seemed I still needed my mother to remind me my heart was beating. Now she’s not here and my heart is anxious and it is breaking. I know I need to let it break so I can put myself back together. Hovering between broken and not broken just prolongs the pain, keeps it alive, but it also reminds me that I am alive.

My heart will lead me. It will remind me of who I am and of who I am becoming. It’s the mother of my being, it’s where the Mother lives and now it is where my mother lives.

As I lay my hand over my chest and feel the steady rhythm of life pulsing within me, I relax. My heart is still beating. I’m still here. My life is still unfolding in perfect time to the music of the Universe.

Now, I can breathe. To swim through the emotion and let it find its way onto the page brings solace and healing. May your heart lead you to peace and joy.

Why Cauldron of Healing?

A cauldron is a container in which things are transformed by the heat of fire. The fire represents those experiences that help us grow. Our life is the cauldron, the container our soul uses to heal, transform and free us. Here is what I mean by freedom.

Freedom is to enter life more fully,

not to escape it.

Freedom is to enter the body more fully,

not to transcend it.

Freedom is to enter the moment more fully,

not to move beyond it.

Freedom is…

yours.

Cauldron of Healing

The fire brings changes.

Life brings changes.

The wood burns and I with it.

There is no other light but that

which burns within.

The cauldron bears the heat.

All within breaks down just enough

for something new to be born.

I am stirred.

My emotions, my sense of balance

stirred until something else begins.

The heat. The fire. Soon…

the moment of my rebirth.

Joanne Young Elliott ©2016